Entrails

Nobody else ever seems to have the kind of problems that I do. I was driving down 684 one evening, going to meet 2 friends at Playland. It is a fast-paced road; I was probably going about 80 mph and there were a number of other cars. So by the time I notice the giant deer carcass in the middle of the lane coming up, it is too late for me to switch. There were cars on both sides, so I just had to smash right over it. I thought everything seemed ok. My car was still working, I didn’t skid over it and smash or anything. So as I am driving, I realize that there are these nasty bloody bits of fur splattered all over the windshield. “Gross!” I thought, then parked at Playland and went to meet my friends.
We spend a few hours there and when we are coming back, I was telling the story about the deer and how nasty it was that it splattered onto my window. So one friend looks and goes “dude, look down there.” On the front bumper, in that little space are entrails. Deer entrails. That somehow, by driving over them, wrapped themselves around in that little space and were dragging all over. So while I was driving, I just had these flapping entrails with me.
“Ugh!” we 3 said in unison. Then tried using a stick to get them off. But from the drive, they had also bonded themselves there and were not budging. I had to go to my friend’s house and they used a hose, sticks, gardening tools, and anything else possible to pry them off of my car.

As far as I have heard, this situation was still pretty much unique to me. Especially as someone who lives in the Bronx.